1.31.2007

Rascism, Alive & Well

So here's a video of Paris Hiltwat using racial slurs in what appears to be a drugged-out state; although that is no excuse.

I was able to snag this cinematic gem from the website http://www.wwtdd.com. According to the site, Paris is most noted for quoting the following phrases:

"I am a fat ugly Jewish bitch … I’m a little jap-y Jew … I am a little black whore, I got fucked in the butt for coke … I’m a nigger and I’ll (unintelligible) … I’m black and I steal shit, Yo I’m black and I steal…"

Thank you Tyler Durden for your amazing espose`!

This is redundant coming from a person who is never seen in public without her blue contact lenses (she has brown eyes and brown hair and you can see it in the link below:)

http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/archives/005189.html

Why does she try so hard to be aryan? Still, I wonder. Lemme try it out...hey Paris, all the $$$ U got, Y don'tcha get that ugly jew-nose fixed, eh?! Hmmm... nah. I don't know what she gets out of it.

How about a less Paris-style offensive, less rascist version:

Ms. Hiltwat, please get the following items fixed as it drives me to gouge my eyes with sharpened tampons:
  1. Your ashy gargoyle feet (size 11),
  2. your grotty 'Man-Hands',
  3. your infamous 'Wonky-Eye'
  4. and for the love of all that is holy, have some butt implants inserted as soon as possible. I understand white chix are supposed to be flat down there, but DAMN! HO!

Sincerely, the World.

Wow! Once you catch the bigot-bug, it's hard to shake it off! Recovery soon to follow. Until then, watch the vid and cringe in embarassment.The money-shot is when her boyfriend is seen with a look of humiliation on his face.



Enough Methane To Piss Off Al Gore





"If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb."
http://www.uselessfacts.ca/

Monkeys who light their farts...
http://www.engrish.com/detail.php?imagename=monkey-stix.jpg&category=Clothing&date=2004-09-13

"Turn your farts into ringtones!"
http://www.doonuts.com/category/1-movies/8026-new_fart_transmitter.html

1.28.2007

Pussy Galore

ATTENTION ALL CARPET-MUNCHERS!
That's how it's done!
And on a lighter note:

One satisfied customer!

1.26.2007

Disingenuous Ingenuity

Yo. This is what's up.

Since I quit watching TV (with the exception of the ocassional Adult Swim) I've turned to reading fun shit online. Heh, I almost said onloin.

And it hit me. Most successful blogs merely provide you with links and a stupid caption above it. Welcome to Generation ADD.
And since I travel to many funny and interesting web pages, I'm taking it upon myself to provide communities with the same
information that my fragile little mind comes across. The virgin weeps and it's all for the not-better.

BEHOLD! An example below:

Immaculate Conception
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070124/ap_on_sc/britain_virgin_birth

Snow In Arizona
http://www.cnn.com/2007/WEATHER/01/22/winter.weather.ap/index.html?section=cnn_latest

Find out if your local public school sucks on a global scale
http://www.greatschools.net/

1.25.2007

WELKOMMEN!


It's because I have a tendency to use my first blog to bitch a lot that I decided to use this one for all things light. Yea, too much work to have both, but hey. I need a vehicle for my ever increasing frustration. Too bad.

So use this one to not get sick of me!

In lieu of new blog celebration...

Here:
Have a flamboyant unicorn. I think I'll name him Teddy. If that doesn't scream Las Vegas entertainer, I don't know what does.

*sigh* I did have a MyLittle Pony growing up. But just one. Even then, I thought it was gay. But God help me! Pastel colors to little girls are like cocaine to Kate Moss. I was gonna say Linsdsey but that c*u*n*t has no sense of humor.

Why a unicorn would wear ballerina shoes and an erection at half-mast is beyond me.

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